So I hadn't posted for months, so a lot of songs went unmentioned. Here are some of my recent favorites:
Rosa Parks -Outcast
Bounce -Timbaland "Bounce, like your ass has the hiccups" "Hold up. Hell naw. Like Britney Spears I wear no draws." amazing. also, lots of panting.
Cleveland Shake -Girl Talk
Come Around -M.I.A. really good
Electric Feel -MGMT
All These Things I've Done -The Killers I really like "I've got soul, but I'm not a soldier"
Ain't No Rest for the Wicked -Cage the Elephant
Take Me Out -Franz Ferdinand
I Turn My Camera On -Spoon
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
Blast from the Past
Wrote the following letter in 10th grade, which was supposed to be sent 4 years later. I got it last week. I cannot believe some of the things I wrote. [ ] designates my current thoughts.
Dear Sarah Skye McNees,
It sounds funny to say this, but this letter is from you. I am writing this in June of 2005 for Mr. Burr's AP World History class. I should be reading this is 2009. Being a sophomore right now, I have some plans for what I want to do in the future. According to my game plan, I should be in UCLA [UCSD], my second year. I hope I am still working out [HA]. At the moment, the gym with the rock-climbing wall looks fun. Now, I'm thinking my future career will be as an epidemiologist [still true]. I hope I've made some friends [the best!]. Could be hard because I was planning to be living at home to save money for medical school [yeah right].
I have accomplished a lot this year. As a sophomore, I took two AP classes. In addition, I played Varsity soccer and ran Varsity track. In soccer, I was named defensive MVP and second team all-league. The team placed second in city. Track didn't work out as well. The last four weeks in a row I have re-pulled my hamstring. I had to drop out of the league championships because of fear of greater injury. I'm also trying to watch out for my future in soccer. I just quit Tianna's U16 Blue team for Richard Simm's U16 White team. My current thoughts are that I will not pursue team sports in college, but if I have, good for me!
This year was mostly easy, just some trouble in my AP World History class. My highest grade is in my AP Chemistry class. I've come to be friends with a lot of people, especially nerds. They study a lot and are really smart, but not losers [hahahaha, this is probably my favorite line of the letter. definitely talking about Divya here]. I chat with many of the people on the track team. One tragic event this year was grandpa Max's death. I missed school and we flew to Hawaii for his funeral. I wept a lot. It was the first real funeral I've ever been to. Before, I was too young to understand what was going on. Like I said before, my highlights were in my soccer, also having been captain of the team I quit. Plus, I learned how to solve a Rubix's cube [wish I still did] and knit.
The busyness in my life has really picked up, which is weird because I've finished my AP testing. I have a research paper for one of my AP classes, a couple class presentations, photo projects, and letters to people, including two more to myself. I am worried because I have to raise the grade I have in AP World History from 87.88% to at least 90. Incredibly, I just became aware that my grade in AP Chem is 100%. When I found out, I was shocked and asked the teacher if it was a mistake. I knew it would be an A, but never that high. It is from all the extra credit I did during the year. It must suck for you because I don't think professors give E.C. in college. In a way, some of the work is a little fun to have. I like making specific plans and timetables. Also, it makes me more productive and I can see results immediately[I sound like an idiot]. The only problem is that I have no time for things I want to do for myself, like watch TV or talk to friends.
I have a couple goals for the upcoming summer. I hope to learn how to surf again [worst idea ever!]. Not knowing how to surf when I am so close to the beach seems like it should be a crime [definitely dont think this anymore]. I also want to do karate. It just looks like fun. I am relying on my friends Divya Subrahmanyam and Pearl Ko to accompany me for these goals. A previous goal that I've now dismissed is to complete a triathlon which consists of a 2.3 mile swim, 112 mile bike, and running a marathon, called the Ironman [I don't know what I was thinking when I made this a goal].
Hopefully it's not the case anymore, but mom doesn't let me watch TV during the week, but I watch a lot on the weekends. When I'm reading this, technology will be so different. IPods, TVs, and computers will all probably be combined into one small, handheld device [the iPhone]. I know it doesn't sound too much like something I would do, but I hope I'm not partying too much (ha, ha) [definitely not something I would do]. Remember, schoolwork comes first [HA]. I was hoping to start a scrapbook soon and put memories of big events in it. If I start soon, my first entry will be from our Easter vacation to Las Vegas. Next, it will be the trip we are taking to Sweden to play soccer. I am really looking forward to it. I'm supposed to be playing attacking center midfield. I hope to met people from all over the world. I've heard everybody comes up to the Americans because we're the only ones whose shirts say soccer instead of football [was approached by no one]. I am trying to make 100 red, white, and blue bracelets out of string to pass out to some of the players I meet and become better friends with [maybe made 30, didn't give any out]. I've enclosed one to help you remember the good ol' times [where'd the d go?]. Hope you've enjoyed this letter.
From,
Sarah Skye McNees
Dear Sarah Skye McNees,
It sounds funny to say this, but this letter is from you. I am writing this in June of 2005 for Mr. Burr's AP World History class. I should be reading this is 2009. Being a sophomore right now, I have some plans for what I want to do in the future. According to my game plan, I should be in UCLA [UCSD], my second year. I hope I am still working out [HA]. At the moment, the gym with the rock-climbing wall looks fun. Now, I'm thinking my future career will be as an epidemiologist [still true]. I hope I've made some friends [the best!]. Could be hard because I was planning to be living at home to save money for medical school [yeah right].
I have accomplished a lot this year. As a sophomore, I took two AP classes. In addition, I played Varsity soccer and ran Varsity track. In soccer, I was named defensive MVP and second team all-league. The team placed second in city. Track didn't work out as well. The last four weeks in a row I have re-pulled my hamstring. I had to drop out of the league championships because of fear of greater injury. I'm also trying to watch out for my future in soccer. I just quit Tianna's U16 Blue team for Richard Simm's U16 White team. My current thoughts are that I will not pursue team sports in college, but if I have, good for me!
This year was mostly easy, just some trouble in my AP World History class. My highest grade is in my AP Chemistry class. I've come to be friends with a lot of people, especially nerds. They study a lot and are really smart, but not losers [hahahaha, this is probably my favorite line of the letter. definitely talking about Divya here]. I chat with many of the people on the track team. One tragic event this year was grandpa Max's death. I missed school and we flew to Hawaii for his funeral. I wept a lot. It was the first real funeral I've ever been to. Before, I was too young to understand what was going on. Like I said before, my highlights were in my soccer, also having been captain of the team I quit. Plus, I learned how to solve a Rubix's cube [wish I still did] and knit.
The busyness in my life has really picked up, which is weird because I've finished my AP testing. I have a research paper for one of my AP classes, a couple class presentations, photo projects, and letters to people, including two more to myself. I am worried because I have to raise the grade I have in AP World History from 87.88% to at least 90. Incredibly, I just became aware that my grade in AP Chem is 100%. When I found out, I was shocked and asked the teacher if it was a mistake. I knew it would be an A, but never that high. It is from all the extra credit I did during the year. It must suck for you because I don't think professors give E.C. in college. In a way, some of the work is a little fun to have. I like making specific plans and timetables. Also, it makes me more productive and I can see results immediately[I sound like an idiot]. The only problem is that I have no time for things I want to do for myself, like watch TV or talk to friends.
I have a couple goals for the upcoming summer. I hope to learn how to surf again [worst idea ever!]. Not knowing how to surf when I am so close to the beach seems like it should be a crime [definitely dont think this anymore]. I also want to do karate. It just looks like fun. I am relying on my friends Divya Subrahmanyam and Pearl Ko to accompany me for these goals. A previous goal that I've now dismissed is to complete a triathlon which consists of a 2.3 mile swim, 112 mile bike, and running a marathon, called the Ironman [I don't know what I was thinking when I made this a goal].
Hopefully it's not the case anymore, but mom doesn't let me watch TV during the week, but I watch a lot on the weekends. When I'm reading this, technology will be so different. IPods, TVs, and computers will all probably be combined into one small, handheld device [the iPhone]. I know it doesn't sound too much like something I would do, but I hope I'm not partying too much (ha, ha) [definitely not something I would do]. Remember, schoolwork comes first [HA]. I was hoping to start a scrapbook soon and put memories of big events in it. If I start soon, my first entry will be from our Easter vacation to Las Vegas. Next, it will be the trip we are taking to Sweden to play soccer. I am really looking forward to it. I'm supposed to be playing attacking center midfield. I hope to met people from all over the world. I've heard everybody comes up to the Americans because we're the only ones whose shirts say soccer instead of football [was approached by no one]. I am trying to make 100 red, white, and blue bracelets out of string to pass out to some of the players I meet and become better friends with [maybe made 30, didn't give any out]. I've enclosed one to help you remember the good ol' times [where'd the d go?]. Hope you've enjoyed this letter.
From,
Sarah Skye McNees
Friday, June 19, 2009
Father's Day
I'm really only writing this for myself, in hopes that in the end it helps.
So this is my first Father's Day without him.
I've been wearily anticipating this day for the last 3 months. Off the top of my head, I knew that Father's Day this year was June 21st, and that last year it was the 15th. Last year it was a pretty big day for me. It marked the beginning of the end.
I had been home just a month before for Mother's Day and Deep Blu Something, and things didn't seem too bad.
But in that month things changed. I had already planned out my summer--stay in San Diego, have fun with my friends, play Safari. And then out of the blue, I got an email from my mom. It pretty much told me that I needed to come home for the summer. It wasn't like a 'you should consider.' It didn't specifically say it, but it read more like, 'this may be your last chance.' I had no idea what I would be going home to. In a way, I always suspected the worst, but at the same time denied it the best I could. I pretty much spent everyday for the two weeks leading up to and through finals crying. Makes studying relatively difficult.
June 13th. Huge end of the year party at Duffy's house. I didn't know it at the time, but I pretty much tried to drink away my problems. From what I can remember, I just kept taking shot after shot because none of them were doing anything. Then at some point I was crying on someone's shoulder. And from what I'm told, when I started puking and they tried to put me in a car, I fought back. I was shocked to hear this. Had to make an apology call after that.
June 14th. Woke up early so I could walk back to my apartment to shower before going to DUDE. When I got out of the shower, Loryn called me. I had 3 missed calls from my mom, with 3 angry messages. She was supposed to be coming to watch my game, and after a whole week of asking, I still hadn't told her where it would be, and she was already supposed to have left. Fed up, she had gone through my old cell phone records and found Loryn's number in it. I didn't know my mom was an ex-spy. I finally make it to DUDE, the hangover was horrible. And then my mom shows up pissed. She proceeds to sit on the sideline of my field and reads the newspaper while I play. We go to lunch afterwards. I feel so sick I can't eat. I'm so sad I can't help but cry at the table. Moving out sucked. The drive home sucked.
Walking through the front doors of my house was shocking. The last month had caused a dramatic change in his appearance. Two years ago, he was overweight, big belly, 225 lbs. Now he was maybe 120 lbs. Maybe. At 5'11" There was no fat--only small muscle outlines and bones. It was horrifying. I was scared to give him a hug. Scared that I would hurt him. It would only get worse in the next month.
June 15th. Father's Day. When I got up my mom asked me what I had gotten him for a present. I obviously did not want to be home. I said my presence was his present. She told me to go to the deli down the street and get him a few of the mini chocolate eclairs. I stopped by Barnes and Noble and picked up a Sudoku booklet as well. One of the biggest regrets of my life. I hate myself for that day. I was so selfish. A day meant to be thanking, after 18 years of, well, of everything. This is how I repaid him? This is how I spent my last Father's Day? I will never forgive myself. And of course, he had a bite of the eclair out of politeness, but my mom and I would have to finish the rest. He didn't like it because the chemo had affected his taste buds. And later I would have to finish the Sudokus. He was so tired all the time, he was only able to complete a few.
And that marked the beginning of the end.
Thinking back on today, I guess the name "Father's Day," the idea of the day, was far worse than the day itself. This Sunday wasn't actually that eventful. Three months led up quite the anti-climax.
But anyway, here's to my dad.
R.I.P
Ron McNees
7.17.08
I love you.
And I miss you.
So this is my first Father's Day without him.
I've been wearily anticipating this day for the last 3 months. Off the top of my head, I knew that Father's Day this year was June 21st, and that last year it was the 15th. Last year it was a pretty big day for me. It marked the beginning of the end.
I had been home just a month before for Mother's Day and Deep Blu Something, and things didn't seem too bad.
But in that month things changed. I had already planned out my summer--stay in San Diego, have fun with my friends, play Safari. And then out of the blue, I got an email from my mom. It pretty much told me that I needed to come home for the summer. It wasn't like a 'you should consider.' It didn't specifically say it, but it read more like, 'this may be your last chance.' I had no idea what I would be going home to. In a way, I always suspected the worst, but at the same time denied it the best I could. I pretty much spent everyday for the two weeks leading up to and through finals crying. Makes studying relatively difficult.
June 13th. Huge end of the year party at Duffy's house. I didn't know it at the time, but I pretty much tried to drink away my problems. From what I can remember, I just kept taking shot after shot because none of them were doing anything. Then at some point I was crying on someone's shoulder. And from what I'm told, when I started puking and they tried to put me in a car, I fought back. I was shocked to hear this. Had to make an apology call after that.
June 14th. Woke up early so I could walk back to my apartment to shower before going to DUDE. When I got out of the shower, Loryn called me. I had 3 missed calls from my mom, with 3 angry messages. She was supposed to be coming to watch my game, and after a whole week of asking, I still hadn't told her where it would be, and she was already supposed to have left. Fed up, she had gone through my old cell phone records and found Loryn's number in it. I didn't know my mom was an ex-spy. I finally make it to DUDE, the hangover was horrible. And then my mom shows up pissed. She proceeds to sit on the sideline of my field and reads the newspaper while I play. We go to lunch afterwards. I feel so sick I can't eat. I'm so sad I can't help but cry at the table. Moving out sucked. The drive home sucked.
Walking through the front doors of my house was shocking. The last month had caused a dramatic change in his appearance. Two years ago, he was overweight, big belly, 225 lbs. Now he was maybe 120 lbs. Maybe. At 5'11" There was no fat--only small muscle outlines and bones. It was horrifying. I was scared to give him a hug. Scared that I would hurt him. It would only get worse in the next month.
June 15th. Father's Day. When I got up my mom asked me what I had gotten him for a present. I obviously did not want to be home. I said my presence was his present. She told me to go to the deli down the street and get him a few of the mini chocolate eclairs. I stopped by Barnes and Noble and picked up a Sudoku booklet as well. One of the biggest regrets of my life. I hate myself for that day. I was so selfish. A day meant to be thanking, after 18 years of, well, of everything. This is how I repaid him? This is how I spent my last Father's Day? I will never forgive myself. And of course, he had a bite of the eclair out of politeness, but my mom and I would have to finish the rest. He didn't like it because the chemo had affected his taste buds. And later I would have to finish the Sudokus. He was so tired all the time, he was only able to complete a few.
And that marked the beginning of the end.
Thinking back on today, I guess the name "Father's Day," the idea of the day, was far worse than the day itself. This Sunday wasn't actually that eventful. Three months led up quite the anti-climax.
But anyway, here's to my dad.
R.I.P
Ron McNees
7.17.08
I love you.
And I miss you.
1st Week Home
So, I'm really bored right now. I feel super sick so I'm not up for much more than just sitting here. But I must say, this is absolutely my favorite chair in the world. It's a brown Lay-z-Boy. It's so soft, and large, and perfect. Reclines back, feet up. The world's best! Got it for my dad, and mom doesn't sit on it, so really it's MY chair. I probably spend 80% of my time in it these days. Yup.
As much as I was dreading heading back to LA, the summer is going far better than expected. Left San Diego Saturday at 11 (was supposed to be 10) and passed 2 accidents. But the wait wasn't that long, so they must have been recent. I got home and no joke had 20 minutes to unpack my entire San Diego life all by myself so that I could pick up 3 girls and drive to Long Beach for my first The LAW practice. I was so nervous, my hands were shaking. Didn't help that I hadn't had time to eat either.
Practice was fun. I wasn't sure what kind of turnout we'd have and didn't know what people expected so we just scrimmaged for most of the time. Turns out people would rather do drills. I was pretty surprised, but happy to comply. Sunday I was a little more ready with a couple planned drills. Some UCLA girls came out and caught on very quickly, so that was great. I definitely think this weekend will go even better. Especially now that we've developed a sort of game plan for the summer, and an idea of what we want to run.
Saturday night, Jane came over. I BBQed. First time doing it by myself. I think I was probably most proud that I immediately remembered to turn on the propane. Sad that my dad never got to teach me how to. When he was out there, I'd only go out to check how long until dinner was ready. My cousin Dave had to show me how to use the grill, and then the Swedes used it too, but I was banned from going outside. But yeah, the dinner turned out great! That was probably more real cooking than I'd done the entire year in San Diego. After dinner we decided to have a little fun. And boy do I love playing board games! I used to play Connect 4 everyday after school. On the other hand, I can't even remember the last time I won Pretty Pretty Princess :(
Sunday night I went to Balls' house in Downtown. Let's just say I haven't been there in years, and it's not the type of place you want to drive around lost in. Before I left, my mom reminded me to be careful there, she said "You're definitely not in La Jolla anymore." So first, I got off the freeway and went the wrong way. Thank cod the streets are numbered, so I knew to turn around. Then, I just couldn't find the right apartment. I couldn't tell what block it was on, and I didn't want to park to far away. I might have circled 3 times before I found it. But this wasn't just circling one block. The streets are ONE-WAY! So I would have to circle all 5 blocks. A couple times I definitely almost turned into oncoming traffic. Yikes. Finally I figured out where I wanted to go. Now it was only a matter of parking. Fast forward, it got to the point where I was thinking 8th time's a charm. Finally I found a spot and parallel-parked. Brenda would have been proud. I mean, it was like 2 spaces, but it was on the left side of the road! But by the time I got out of the car I had completely forgotten where the apartment was. Definitely started walking the wrong way.
Later that night, the Lakers were celebrating their victory, and we decided to venture to a bar. Holy smokes! The streets of Downtown LA were out of control! EVERYONE was in purple and yellow. Riot police were everywhere. People were all over the streets. Cars could barely get by. At one stoplight a white convertible pulled up and 12 people just climbed onto it and started jumping. If that had been me driving, I would've peed in my pants right there. Trash cans were on fire. Dumpsters were in the streets. Horns honking continuously. I was scurred. Bars/restaurants were closed, so we headed back to the apartment. We swung by our cars to make sure they were still in one piece. One guy who had left earlier had had his window smashed and some stuff stolen. My car was luckily still in one piece. Stayed 3 hours extra to wait out the riots. When I left, some guy was getting arrested outside the apartment.
Over the week, I've just been job applicationing. Learning that I'm going to have to be a lot less picky. Hopefully I'll find something by the end of next week. Even though I was hoping to already have worked this whole week.
Oh, and last night Karlie and I biked to pick-up in Venice Beach. I forgot how much I dislike the sand. No speed. No hops. Only got like halfway of the 6in vertical I normally have. Got a migrane on the way back. Puked 3 times last night. Still not feeling great. But at least I have a reason to spend more time in my favorite chair!
As much as I was dreading heading back to LA, the summer is going far better than expected. Left San Diego Saturday at 11 (was supposed to be 10) and passed 2 accidents. But the wait wasn't that long, so they must have been recent. I got home and no joke had 20 minutes to unpack my entire San Diego life all by myself so that I could pick up 3 girls and drive to Long Beach for my first The LAW practice. I was so nervous, my hands were shaking. Didn't help that I hadn't had time to eat either.
Practice was fun. I wasn't sure what kind of turnout we'd have and didn't know what people expected so we just scrimmaged for most of the time. Turns out people would rather do drills. I was pretty surprised, but happy to comply. Sunday I was a little more ready with a couple planned drills. Some UCLA girls came out and caught on very quickly, so that was great. I definitely think this weekend will go even better. Especially now that we've developed a sort of game plan for the summer, and an idea of what we want to run.
Saturday night, Jane came over. I BBQed. First time doing it by myself. I think I was probably most proud that I immediately remembered to turn on the propane. Sad that my dad never got to teach me how to. When he was out there, I'd only go out to check how long until dinner was ready. My cousin Dave had to show me how to use the grill, and then the Swedes used it too, but I was banned from going outside. But yeah, the dinner turned out great! That was probably more real cooking than I'd done the entire year in San Diego. After dinner we decided to have a little fun. And boy do I love playing board games! I used to play Connect 4 everyday after school. On the other hand, I can't even remember the last time I won Pretty Pretty Princess :(
Sunday night I went to Balls' house in Downtown. Let's just say I haven't been there in years, and it's not the type of place you want to drive around lost in. Before I left, my mom reminded me to be careful there, she said "You're definitely not in La Jolla anymore." So first, I got off the freeway and went the wrong way. Thank cod the streets are numbered, so I knew to turn around. Then, I just couldn't find the right apartment. I couldn't tell what block it was on, and I didn't want to park to far away. I might have circled 3 times before I found it. But this wasn't just circling one block. The streets are ONE-WAY! So I would have to circle all 5 blocks. A couple times I definitely almost turned into oncoming traffic. Yikes. Finally I figured out where I wanted to go. Now it was only a matter of parking. Fast forward, it got to the point where I was thinking 8th time's a charm. Finally I found a spot and parallel-parked. Brenda would have been proud. I mean, it was like 2 spaces, but it was on the left side of the road! But by the time I got out of the car I had completely forgotten where the apartment was. Definitely started walking the wrong way.
Later that night, the Lakers were celebrating their victory, and we decided to venture to a bar. Holy smokes! The streets of Downtown LA were out of control! EVERYONE was in purple and yellow. Riot police were everywhere. People were all over the streets. Cars could barely get by. At one stoplight a white convertible pulled up and 12 people just climbed onto it and started jumping. If that had been me driving, I would've peed in my pants right there. Trash cans were on fire. Dumpsters were in the streets. Horns honking continuously. I was scurred. Bars/restaurants were closed, so we headed back to the apartment. We swung by our cars to make sure they were still in one piece. One guy who had left earlier had had his window smashed and some stuff stolen. My car was luckily still in one piece. Stayed 3 hours extra to wait out the riots. When I left, some guy was getting arrested outside the apartment.
Over the week, I've just been job applicationing. Learning that I'm going to have to be a lot less picky. Hopefully I'll find something by the end of next week. Even though I was hoping to already have worked this whole week.
Oh, and last night Karlie and I biked to pick-up in Venice Beach. I forgot how much I dislike the sand. No speed. No hops. Only got like halfway of the 6in vertical I normally have. Got a migrane on the way back. Puked 3 times last night. Still not feeling great. But at least I have a reason to spend more time in my favorite chair!
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